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Words – Shehnaz Khan I had barely been in the presence of this family friend for 30 seconds, before the sentence she had been bursting to utter had come tumbling out. But when you’ve repeatedly been asked that same question hundreds of times from people who you only see at weddings, parties or funerals, it can be slightly exhausting to coin a valid response.
‘Whenever it’s supposed to happen,’ I half-heartedly replied, fighting to ensure I didn’t roll my eyes or sigh in exasperation.
I’m not sorry if the idea of opposing ‘sell-by dates’ and instead choosing to get degrees, secure our dream jobs, travel the world, build a career, buy our own houses, our own cars and give everything to ourselves, (married or not) isn’t enough for you.
It’s enough for us, and that’s all that should ever matter.
They expect a ready-made wife who is a doctor with five degrees, supermodel looks and who drives an Audi to simply stay at home when they get married, and ignore the fact that they are offering much less than what we come to the table with.
We are taught to overlook these shortfalls and settle – we simply can’t win.
Whether it’s carefully crafted remarks such as ‘My daughter Bushra* was married at 19,’ or ‘My son Imran* is looking for a wife,’ the hints and comments are .